Listen to what she says
Let’s start with the obvious. I’d bet good money that she’s already dropped plenty of hints about what she likes in her jewellery. If you’d been paying attention you’d probably know by now whether she favours a solitaire or a three stone engagement ring, or whether she’s a platinum or a white gold kinda girl. But you weren’t paying attention were you? It’s OK, I’m not judging. Having said that, if you’ve got the luxury of time, it’s certainly not too late to start looking out for those little hints and tips on what kind of engagement ring she favours. What does she say about her friends’ engagment rings? NEVER try to steer the conversation towards jewelry though in the hope that she might give you some kind of clue! She’ll see straight through it – you’re not that good a liar.
Let’s face it though, chances are you’re not that organized. If you don’t have another six months to wait round hoping that she’ll drop some hints, here’s some engagement ring advice to help you make the right decision. This is not something you want to get wrong!
What does she wear already?
This is such an obvious point, you’d be amazed by the number of guys who neglect to consider it when buying an engagement band. Go through her jewellery. Is there a lot of yellow gold? Or perhaps it’s silver glinting back at you? I don’t expect you to have an acid tester available, so you probably won’t be able to tell the difference between white gold and platinum, but we’ll worry about that later. We’re just trying to establish a general theme here.
WARNING – don’t let her catch you. At best, she’ll be on to you straight away. At worst, she’ll be expecting to come home and catch you in her underwear next time.
So we’ve got a starting point, but let’s not get carried away. Maybe she wants a change from what she usually wears as costume jewellery? A little bit more detective work is still required…
Ask her friends
But choose wisely! I’m sure you don’t need me to tell you what could go wrong here, but some engagement ring advice from a close friend is invaluable. Don’t tell her whole circle of friends in the hope that at least one of them will offer some useful advice – pick one or two out who you think know her particularly well and ask them what they think.
Two things to bear in mind here:
1) Some girls look forward to announcing their engagement to their friends. Will your new fiancée be entirely thrilled to find out they knew before she did?
2) Don’t take her best mate to a jewellers to help you pick. Especially if it’s the mate who always gets a little too flirty with everyone else’s boyfriends once she had a few drinks. See where I’m going here?
Find out her size
Hopefully you’ve got a general idea by now about what she’s after, but the size of engagement ring you go for is a huge factor in making that special moment just right. Too small, and you can’t even get the damn thing on. Too large is even worse, believe me (“do you think I’ve got fat fingers?”).
Fortunately, this bit is easy. Engagement rings come in sizes using an alphabetical scale. Print off this size chart and go through her jewellery again (you really ought to be careful if she caught you there first time). Don’t do what I did and pick a ring that she never wears because it’s too large! (d’oh).
If in doubt, err on the side of caution and go a little larger. Engagement rings can be adjusted if you get it wrong, so don’t worry, but it’s an easier job if it’s too large.
The Four C’s
So let’s say you’re going traditional and opting for a diamond engagement ring over moissanite, emerald or cubic zirconia. What are you looking for? Well, the quality of a diamond is measured by the four C’s: Carat, Clarity, Colour & Cut.
Carat – This refers to the size of the diamond. The bigger the diamond, the higher the number of carats. Carats are subdivided into points, with 100 points making up each carat. Big is beautiful when it comes to diamond engagement rings, but size isn’t everything, as I’m sure you’re aware…
Clarity – Diamonds sometimes contain slight imperfections known as inclusions, although if your “fiancé to be” is particularly gullible you might get away with calling it a “birthmark” and claiming that it adds character. Having said that, it’s not usually worth getting too hung up on an inclusion you’d need a magnifying glass to see – just watch out for any large visible inclusions that effect the diamonds ability to reflect and scatter light.
Colour – Although some colour diamonds are highly sought after and expensive, when it comes to diamond engagement rings it’s best to pick one with as little colour as possible. Diamonds are pure carbon, but the colour can be effected by the presence of Nitrogen as an impurity. The more nitrogen present, the more yellow the diamond looks. Clarity is graded on a scale from D (well done if you can afford one of these), to Z.
D-F are “colourless”, G-J are “near colourless”, K-M are “slightly colored”. Whilst N-Y are yellow or brown
Cut – This is the only factor not controlled by nature. The way a diamond is cut will make a huge difference to the “fire” – how brilliantly the stone reflects the light. The cut also controls the shape of the diamond. The most popular is probably the round cut, but it’s also worth checking out princess cut (basically square), marquise cut (elongated), cushion cut (oval) or heart-shaped (er, heart-shaped).
The Fifth C
Cost. We’ve all heard the rule about how you should look to pay the equivalent of one/two months salary on your engagement ring (though it seems to keep going up!). This was probably a clever marketing ploy lost in the mists of time, but as a ball park it’s probably not far wrong. Whether you’re going for a large diamond ring, or something more affordable like Cubic Zirconia or Moissanite, don’t be afraid to shop round for a deal. Make sure you look online as much as possible, since you’ll often find better prices here than you will instore.
